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the challenge of change

(40 posts) (14 voices)

Started 2 years ago by
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Anonymous
Unregistered

Hi Boyz and Girlz,

I've been stewing about something since yesterdays pod call and I just wanted to get it off of my chest (I apologize in advance to my fellow podmates for blowing the whistle and giving crap :) )

So Dr. Frank asked the question "On a scale of 1-100, where do you think you are in regards to being resistant to change?". Most of the Docs on the call said between 60-70%. I have to say that I was floored by that response. I have to be honest... I got off the phone a little bit pissed... I had to calm myself down before I went to start adjusting. :)

My question is... if you only have 30% availability or willingness to change... what's the point of coaching? Why are you paying these guys your hard earned money if you are not willing and ready to change and do what they are telling you to do? I know I can be a bit of a hard ass with you guys sometime, but in reality it really does come down to this one important question? Are you really willing to make the changes necessary in order to bring your dreams to fruition? Or are you hoping that by doing the same things you've always done and MAYBE implementing one or two of the pearls of wisdom from Dr. Frank, Dr. Sea and Dr. Cecile that it will start the ball rolling? Really? I mean seriously... Really?

It's time guys. There is a whole world of people out there who really need the care that you have to offer. You have a family who believes in you and trusts that you are doing everything possible to give them the life you promised them. And... there is a voice inside of you (that voice that decided to be a chiropractor in the first place) that has hopes and dreams and is ready for you to play.

I encourage you to really take some time and evaluate why you are choosing to resist change. How is that choice benefiting you? How is it a disservice to you? And then decide (one way or the other) if you are willing to change.

D.

Posted 2 years ago #
Anonymous
Unregistered

I'm still in the Foundation module and maybe its not my place to jump in since I wasn't on the call, but maybe the aha for these docs that are in the 60-70% range is simply to become AWARE that they are not that open to change.....YET! I've really come to learn that I've been focusing on changing the WRONG things up to this point. Things that really aren't that important to help me grow.....as a person and in practice! But, the WILLINGNESS is not the only part of the equation. Maybe some need to become AWARE first, then be WILLING to change, as we are all ABLE!

Just a thot!

Posted 2 years ago #
Jason Whittaker
Member

Please refer to the Neuroscience of Change download.....change is toughest between doing and being...who runs the physiology, the body or the mind. Time to take the mind out of the body and put it back into where it belongs....the brain.

Its not BE > DO > HAVE

Its THINK > DO > BE > DO > HAVE...call it the new "Whittaker" Principle for dream manifestation.

Such a narcissist, aren't I?

Trust me we are all in the same boat for change, gang.

Posted 2 years ago #
Anonymous
Unregistered

I know for me, Dr. D., the answer is fear (and I've heard that word bandied about on PODs and in this forum from others but forgive me for looking for co-dependents here). I love how Bob Newhart in the "stop it" skit keeps saying, "we don't go there". I am slowly and painstakingly learning to stop playing the victim to lots of childhood and ancestral crap. Maybe Bob has a point there. Let's stop going there and just stop it. The fear of all of the unfounded horrors that might occur come from such deep places in our own pasts and the pasts of our ancestors who so kindly bequeathed them to many of us (wars, the Depression, genocides (no, I'm not kidding), starvation) can paralyze us. Some more some less - that depends on personal and familial history. I don't relish tossing over my money to DC Mentors every month so that I can sit on my ass for a year and a half listening to my coach for hours and then doing nothing. But it was worth every penny! I grew. My wife grew. Our marriage is growing. Our practice is now growing. And it's because we have coaches who are patient enough to understand we have fears and to still stay steady and let us figure it out that the change started and continues to happen. I'm learning that the fear is unreal and the risks are worth it and not dangerous. You may think, "man he sounds pretty lame and wussy" but the fears of "what might be out there" were very real in the world of my parents and grandparents. The imprinting is very powerful. I think the resistance to change discussed on the PODs is definitely worth looking at. Admitting that you are only 30% engaged is a great start. We can all help each other see that, despite our "resistance" (aka fear), we are all pushing through it, seeing successes and moving forward. This can then open us up more to the coaches advice and to advice from each other leading to more and more of those percentages falling away faster and faster. Dr. D., I've told you before that I love your straightforward, no nonsense, challenging way. In this case a little dose of love and understanding that not all of us have cojones the size of... never mind, the cojones thing doesn't work in this case. But I truly admire your way of seeing a problem and dealing with it. I hope to learn more from you in this regard. Keep up the challenges but don't forget the little spoonful of sugar.

Posted 2 years ago #
Jason Whittaker
Member

Oops....the second DO should read DO to the power of 10......

Posted 2 years ago #
Anonymous
Unregistered

To quote a calculation of odds that ______ will happen (insert your fears) from the book The Noticer....
40% will never occur
30% have already happened in the past
12% is our needless imagination of some health problem that may be occurring
10% petty worries about what other people think (ME!)
8% are legitimate fears/concerns that can actually be dealt with

This was an eye opener for me when I read it....hope this helps, Zachary.

Nice call, Jason.....I know its always been ass backward as far as....BE, DO, HAVE!

Posted 2 years ago #
Anonymous
Unregistered

My wife and I have a line that we "use" on each other: There you go imagining a future that most likely won't happen, believing it's already happening and living your life according to it.

Healthy, huh?

Posted 2 years ago #
Anonymous
Unregistered

It's all a matter of Perspective, right?

Posted 2 years ago #
DrPerron
Member

I am in "fear" to chime in (7 accounts, there it is, it is out there) but I think it is funny how Dr. D thinks she is harsh. :) "Really?" That must be Canadian harsh.

I read Dr. D's post then I was off to actually take care of a few folks and then there was all this so quickly. I am glad I waited because I really liked the various impressions of that "simple" question posed on the POD. And Dr. Russ, always chime in whenever you want. The beauty of the forum is that it allows all of us to discuss subjects that apparently pushes some buttons on POD's. Allowing the conversation to continue and alot of times getting perspectives from those that "are not at that point" (which means nothing, if you have not figured it out yet.) We all have a brain and an opinion so as you did, and thank you, share it.

I think I was most struck by Dr. Zachary's post. So much compassion and perspective. Is it Philadelphia, Saskatchewan? I also share the acknowledgment and appreciation that our coaches give us the space to grow and understand that, just like with our patients, they can only provide the environment and the opportunity for growth but it is up to each of us to do it for ourselves. I just had a chat with Dr. T about the concept of "reflection" and I have had similar chats with our other coaches in the past as well. And what "reflection" is, is that the things that get us the most riled up about others are often the things that we "fear" about ourselves the most. That was not directed at you Dr. D. (promise) I will not assume to know the innerworkings of anyone else's brain, it is challenging enough to figure out what is going on in my own. But since it was so timely I figured I would share the concept to be at least entertained from time to time at our personal discretion. So, I have also gotten off of POD's once in a while over the years and felt the same as Dr. D described. Just pissed off about someone else's mindset. The first time it happened, I mentioned it to Dr. Sovinsky and it was easy to see, when pointed out :), that it was a mindset that I obviously did not enjoy and at least on a level feared. That a particular mindset over a particular issue illicited such a strong emotional response from me was telling. In a sense of "Oh God, don't let me end up like that." And when reflected upon it is easy to see that that thought is a fearful thought. If I was secure in that regard I would not have been moved so much to be so concerned. Just interesting to me. Play with it and it might be revealing at times as it has been for me.

Okay, now everyone think bunny rabbits and pastel colors. :)

Posted 2 years ago #
Jason Whittaker
Member

You know its funny....I love the concept of "reflection" as well Chris and while it is true that the things that get us the most riled up are often the things that we "fear" about ourselves the most, the form it takes can change for each of us. In Danella's case its not in chiropractic (lord knows she has skeletons elsewhere, hell, we all do). Being here first hand when she posted it and prior when she asked me if she should or not, I can tell you she is about as close to a "den mother loving her cubs" about the whole thing as you can get. When it comes to you Mentorites, she cares and wants the best for you just as a mother would of her child....maybe to a fault (at least thats what I say- I'm like Dr. Frank, when you ask, How are you? Response...do you care?)

I, too, love the fact that we seem (especially from coaches-although we are paying them) to have an air of "give them room to grow". However, reflecting back to Sioux falls and thursday's call the urgency level (and therefore tough love) has seemed to go up a notch or two. As it should. Great leaders see equal opportunity in both the assistance and resistance they encounter along the road to greatness. Both are necessary, both act as feedback and both are never absent. The less we polarize the two sides, the less the emotional charge we get from them and the quicker we can reach our goals.

So be covalent, my fellow Mentorites, and neutralize those emotionally charged ions floating around our brains.

Posted 2 years ago #
DrPerron
Member

I tease about the Canadian harshness because I know how not harsh DrD is and how much she wants the best for everyone. It does not surprise me that she hesitated to post something that was a bit of a "verbal spanking" (in Dr. Sea terms) :). It also does not surprise me that you, Jason, told her to go for it. As I would have done as well. I had the same chat with my staff at lunch when one of my techs was waivering about sending something out for eternity. I told her to go for it too. With regard to the forum, Dr. Frank has told me to never delete and just put it out there. I believe we all have enough tact along with the best of intentions for one another to just send it out. Look at all the attention that DrD's post got. I think that was more in an hour than there were all week. Mission accomplished! Although this is a process for certain there is also an aspect of only having one lifetime to do it in so if we are on the 200 year plan then... That is what I like about DrZ's post. He shared a perspective that I would not have been as open to but he sold me, to a point. I share DrD's train of thought and have for years. It perplexes me the lack of action. But then DrZ made me actually use some empathy and realize that we all stRt this process from a different place and I mean mentally, not years in practice. And so without lending excuses, I can empathize that we all have different rocks to rid from our backpacks of life and that leaves me less judgmental. The major point that does not change is the openess to change. We all have different amounts and details to change but it is the willingness to do it that does not leave much room for excuses. So DrD, I agree and with that said I will readily admit that it is a matter of reflection. I, like the rest of you, certainly have "to do" lists left for "tomorrow". So that emotion of what I see others not doing and the results that stem from that is inspiring to me just like I was inspired to hear someone hit 535 last week. Yes this was thinking out loud. You all can thank Dr. Frank.:). Happy Easter! And thank you DrD for spark.

Posted 2 years ago #
drshannon
Member

Wow, great posts all.
I'd like to put another perspective in. I think some of us might not even know we're resistant to change. The Eyfords here thought we were making SO many changes, little tweaks, new systems, hiring, firing, changing hours, on and on.
Let's really talk change though.
Two weeks ago our associate (Dr. Smith) informed us that he bought a practice.
Dr. Smith has been with us for 3 years and is an amazing doctor. We have developed a great level of respect for him and are very good friends. We are ecstatic for him as it is a great opportunity for him. He told us on a Friday, and after many conversations with our coaches over the weekend we met with Dr. Smith on Monday morning and let him know that Monday would be his last day. It was in everyone's best interest to move on. To let him start doing what he needed to be doing and for us to make the changes we needed to and move forward. No Minnesota goodbyes.
As you can imagine the many mixed feelings we had (not wanting him to think we were throwing him out, worried maybe his deal wasn't totally final, worried what our staff would think, what would the patients think, is it too abrupt, etc. etc. etc) we followed our coaches advice. Yep, WE FOLLOWED OUR COACHES ADVICE.
What a concept.
We changed our hours (NOW we're DC mentors hours) and this week rolled with it.

Guess what?
One doctor vs. two, 21 adjusting hours vs. 32 adjusting hours=close to our busiest week ever.
LISTEN TO THE COACHES!
NOW we're ready for change. We know that the big things count. Hindsight is 20/20,

Posted 2 years ago #
Jason Whittaker
Member

And thats why I call you guys the Rockin Morrocans.....yeah, Baby, yeah (says Austin Powers).

Posted 2 years ago #
swaimer
Member

Way to go Dr. D, you bunch of weeners, wait, isn't it time for a member of the 60% club to speak?

It is in fact a fair question, How coachable are you? I make strides, i miss strides and sometimes depending on the day and the issue my number of resistance to change, varies. Example, I did not need to be told to change my hours twice. Maybe 0% resistant to change. I changed techniques to activator over a weekend a few years back, another low resistance decision. So why would I answer 60% right off the bat? Here is my story-
We had an excellent 2010. We were up 25%. Our collections have never been better. Our patient visit have never been so high. I paid off debt as fast as I could. Problem? guess who did not have seven accounts? Guess who just got his A** kicked by the IRS? You can imagine how MR. Empathy himself(DR. Sea), responded."how many times have you been to brain spa?" Long pause. So my reasons for not doing as told are many and mostly pathetic, Now I am scrambling like a mad man to make it work. Picking and choosing systems within the DCM system can be dangerous business.
The second half of the story revolves around what Dr. Shannon just brought up, denial. I have had the ignominious epiphany of being in denial regarding finances, again. So deeply ingrained was this denial that, well, how can you address something that you won't acknowledge? I was so busy throwing alligators(creditors) out of our boat, that one freakin' particularly ugly one crawled in the other side. So before you answer the question about change, remember in humility that there may be some denial in your world. This has been a particularly humbling week. We do have coaches, use them, often, and often times an area of denial and resistance to change presents itself quite clearly. Sometimes it takes a while. So maybe the scale is more dynamic than we imagine. That Dr. D is why i keep coaching. The 200 year plan I was on has been cut to 100 and as I work to implement the 7 accounts, I anticipate that number being reduced to 50. I am grateful for a community (DCM) that cares enough to confront, challenge, encourage, and yes, laugh with. Thank you for letting me be a part of it.
Cheers
ks
Dr. Zachary, your post was one of the most touching I have read in a while. thank you for your candor, you are a great asset to this community!

Dr. D, if you had asked me that same question 3 weeks ago, I would have answered differently

Posted 2 years ago #
drshannon
Member

wow, gotta love it that I got up and left my post a few nights ago thinking I'd go back and finish and there it is, on the forum! So to complete my thought process....
Hindsight is 20/20 and Brad and I have certainly had the reality check this week, "whoa, where would we be if we had made some of those big changes way back when...."

We're certainly looking at change a little differently and having a new respect for our coaching.

Thanks Dr. Swaimer for sharing about Seven Accounts, thank goodness we jumped at that one last BrainSpa. We were completely prepared this year for Mr. Taxman and it was almost humorous writing the check...
I was chuckling hearing Dr. Sea in the back of my mind. 1. You can only spend your money once. 2. If you're paying taxes that means you made money! Not that painful when those two beliefs are in place.

I'm so thankful we can all learn from each other, motivate each other, and call each other out every once in a while. Isn't that what coaching is? Hiring someone to hold you accountable? Funny that we thought we were just hiring 3 coaches but we ended up with a whole tribe of coaches!

Happy Easter everyone!

Posted 2 years ago #
DrPerron
Member

Swaim, sorry to hear of your harsh lesson. It sounds like you would prefer to just be poked at by DrD. Your post was a great perspective though, that I had been thinking about and then there it was, kind of like Dr. Shannon said. It is interseting how certain changes we all do with a snap of the fingers. Little things like switching your technique! :) For me it was dumping all the insurance networks and going open adjusting, yet it took about a year to get freakin uniforms for my staff! I think it all comes to the old "when the pain of the same becomes more than the pain of change" we change. Or like the Eyford's case, which I have experienced with techs a few times, someone else makes the move and then there is this "Ohhhh, this is what the coaches were trying to tell me." :) The thing that I have only recently truly realized is that that type of approach, which I have definitely shared in, is the running from fire to fire, but never getting ahead of things so that there is room for growth. The plate is always full. And what is the prize for that effort... a plateau for as far as the eye can see. Our individual comfort zones. So, what separates the big kids from the kiddie pool filled with "warmth", getting off our arses (In the words of the great DrD :) and doing things before they absolutely have to be done. Like saving for a tax bill. One answer to that Swaimer, keep making more so you can absorb the oops and the rest is obvious. With all that said there is still definitely the learning curve with becoming aware of which somethings actually need to be changed. My bet is though that we all have a list of things we are already aware of and at least for me I have ratched it up lately to get rid of that list. I think it is on parchment.:) And what I have always noticed is that when you get something off the plate that you know should be, that is when you will see what else there is to do. But it is the classic you can't see the forest because of the trees, or however that goes. If your near vision is filled up, until you clear that out or make a move, how can you expect to see what else is out there. Really great thread. I have enjoyed ALL the posts. What a variety of very valid perspectives.

Posted 2 years ago #
drsam
Member

Well I'd like to reflect on some of my personal challenges to change. I have to tell you I feel like I've been on a roaller coaster ride the past few years and it wasn't until Sioux Falls where I had a turning point. Between the continued support from our coaches and a few of you mentorites that I've spilled my emotional frustrations to, I've been able to let go of some dead weight that has been hindering growth. One of my biggest challenges has been fear, the fear of losing what we have, a "good" practice and how I would be judged mainly by patients on those changes. It has been a continued struggle to implement the DC Mentors way, but little by little we have been building more and more courage and with every leap the changes have been all positive! So enough is enough, right?

Since returning from Sioux falls, we have removed all the doors to our treatment rooms to allow for a semi-open adjusting concept, turned our tables around so that the head of the tables are facing the hallway and removed the chairs in the treatment rooms so that patients wouldn't sit instead of just resting and getting onto the adjusting tables. What a huge improvement on patient flow. Not only have we been able to increase the number of patients we see in each cluster without increasing waiting time, we have created this new buz in the office and patients are digging it. We still offer a private room, so far have only 2 of my patients that request it & that's ok.

I can't tell you what an impact that Sioux Falls has been on my staff and how much easier some of these changes have been with their full support. We all have been focusing on how we as a team can improve what we do, be more efficient, out perform our competition and to be able to serve, serve and serve more patients new or exisiting, walk-in or scheduled. Its been AWESOME!

A special thanks to Swaimer, your simple act of encouragement was freakin awesome. Just when I thought my day could not get any better their you were! Thanks to our coaches and each and everyone of you for your ears and continued support.

Posted 2 years ago #
drshannon
Member

Dr Sam...and Dr. Mandy,

AWESOME! Keep rockin!

Posted 2 years ago #
Anonymous
Unregistered

Wow, such incredible posts to come back to after our trip to my families farm. You all amaze me with your ability to go inside and be totally honest with where you are at right now and recognize that change is needed in order to move forward. Ken, I am so incredibly proud of you for putting it out there that you screwed up in not following thru with seven accounts and that you are working hard to get that implemented. In all honesty I think my frustration on our call was really geared towards you (no offense intended here) because in YOU I see a man who is so incredibly open to change and criticism and new ideas. Every time I see you, you are thirsty for more info and ready to talk this thing out. I have to say that I was shocked to hear that you think that you are only 60% ready to change, because I don't believe it for one second. Yes, you screwed up with seven accounts, but look at all the incredible strides you have made this year... huge!! That took some serious "availability" to change. So yes give yourself a huge slap on the wrist from me, but also give yourself some credit for all the work you've done so far.

I know right this second Perron is saying "heh... why is Swaimer getting so much slack..." If you would just get on the 7 accounts I'd give you some slack too. :)

Ultimately I do think that Dr. Z is right in regards to change and fear (quite eloquently put by the way). Fear can be immobilizing, if you let it. And I think a lot of people walk around in total denial in regards to how much fear they actually have and how much it is ruling their lives. I also think that alot of people use it as an excuse or a crutch. I choose to believe that fear can be a light post for the things that we need to change the most. If we are scared to do something it is usually the best road to take.

Awesome work Boyz & Girlz! There is so much more change to come... embrace it and move forward!

Posted 2 years ago #
Anonymous
Unregistered

Posted 2 years ago #
Ed
Member

Wow, you just cannot turn your back on this Forum for a second! As Dr Sovinsky pointed out there was a distinct lull in the level of postings over the last couple of weeks – a case of post seminar basking?! However I must say Danella you lit the fuse again! What struck me most on listening to the webinar was the thought that if our answer depends on the situation then we are highly resistant to change!! Ooopps! That was a real wake up call! I can change but only if……….! I agree Zach that a lot of what we don’t do is down to fear - Dr Frank told me once that my resistance to change is resistance to embrace discomfort not the pressure to perform! But what it also comes down to is a lack of awareness or that we just plain forget! Awareness, Willingness and Ability and as Ken said that is why we still coach! No matter where we are on the scale of 1 -100 we can all improve! None of us are doing everything! And I think a lot of the time we delude ourselves in to believing that we are capable of change! Yet in effect all we are doing is busying ourselves in areas within our comfort zones! It takes someone else to hold a mirror up to us so that we can see the folly of our ways! Which is again why coaching is invaluable but also having a safe area like this Forum is so great? I find that it is definitely easier to spot someone else’s failings than admit to our own!

Another big take away from the call for me was the idea that I am not for the behaviour but I am for the person! That is such a huge concept! I really struggle with the need to be right! The prophet mind set if you like, yet that simple idea helps to dilute that need! In a way it de-personalises the problem and it would seem to help prevent us from being too judgemental!

Posted 2 years ago #
Ed
Member

Posted 2 years ago #
Jason Whittaker
Member

"I'm not for the behaviour but I am for the person"

HUGE. Love this takeaway too, Ed. Thanks for the reminder. Its gotten me to think about my languaging when I speak to others with regards to something I disagree with....always referring to the action, behaviour and idea as oppose to making it personal and about them.

Posted 2 years ago #
Ed
Member

Now admittedly I may be laying myself open to attack here but I have being ruminating over the postings on this topic of being resistant to change and I want to ask whether there is anything lying behind the strength of Danella’s passionate post! A case of “the lady doth protest too much, me thinks!” I mentioned that occasionally we need a mirror held up in front of us to see the unseen! So Danella is there any reason why this issue has tripped your switch so strongly? Just a thought …. But is there something you need to share?! And in fairness us boyz do have to stick together!!!

Posted 2 years ago #
Anonymous
Unregistered

Ed, it's funny you ask that of Dr. Danella. Since posting my post, I figured my own passionate response contained a bit of "doth protesting too mucheth, meselfeth, methinketh". Not that my awareness of all of the emotional blocks was diminished. Lots of the messaging from the past remains. But I am now really working on nurturing my own inner Dr. Danella. Really! I mean REALLY?!?
I think we may have glossed over Dr. Russ's little gem early on in this thread. He seems to think that we might often be working on all of the little "wrong" things. Maybe that should be read "easy" things. But, that said, I know that I worked on a lot of what Dr. Sea referred to as veneer at the beginning of my DCM process. Perhaps we need to start with some of these "easy's" or veneers in order to get ready (not ready to get ready, G'd forbid!) to move on to the big ones like opening doors (eeek), not talking too much (horrors, they'll hate me), firing a secretary (not tech) of 14 years (maybe she'll come wandering in with a shotgun!). I think we shouldn't diminish the hugeness of some of those little easy things. For many of us they are the best place to start. As long as we realize that the big stuff must follow. And fast. Success will lead to success. Even if the first success is miniscule compared to the successes you are having even one year later.

Posted 2 years ago #
danellaw
Member

You know Ed, I've been thinking about that ever since I posted the first time. For me I've had to look at other areas of my life to find where I am being resistant to change. I know that when there is something that "hits my buttons" then there is definitely something in me that I am not acknowledging or simply ignoring. In looking thru the seven areas of life (Physical, Spiritual, Financial, Familial,Mental, Social, Vocational) I've discovered that the biggest area where I have been resistant to change is Emotional and physical. I've had some major health challenges lately because of my resistance to release old Emotional patterns and I've been working with a wonderful woman that Dr. Thackeray suggested to really bring them to my awareness and bring them in to proper balance. So, even though I've never really had any difficulties making huge changes (or tiny changes) in my work or professional life, I've had difficulty changing in other areas. It truly is amazing to see how all the areas of our lives are intertwined and influence each other.

Posted 2 years ago #
DrPerron
Member

Great follow up post Dr. Z, and just know that going open will not kill you and that I have had similar thoughts/fears about released employees going postal. My guess is that I have let go of at least as many as any of you and have yet to require a restraining order. What I have realized is that although it may send a temporary wrinkle in their life, they just don't care enough about us and what we are doing to put forth that kind of effort. If they did then they would likely not be getting "relieved of their duties". :) There is a thread a few pages back about going open. It may help the process.

What keeps popping in my brain is Dr. Frank's often relayed message that change is instant and that it is the decision to make that change that takes whatever time we choose. There in lies the fears, from whatever source they may have originated, and what each of our personal journeys is all about. So keep moving forward and applaud yourselves for actually seeking out help in becoming aware of personal weakness and the desire to do something to do something about it. Most people I think stick there head in the sand and prefer to pretend everything is okay, so we all are out behaving the majority of our "competition". But then it comes down to deciding if we want to consistently out behave ourselves. It really is not challenging to out behave most other chiropractors, sad but true. IMO So what I have done is somewhat take other chiropractors out of the equation when it comes to some competitive enabler of sorts. Like golf is described as being best played against yourself and the course, not against the person playing with you. What if the person playing with you sucks? What does it get you to hit a round of 120 if they hit 130? Not much, likely not even that much fun. So be true to yourselves and that is where you will find you greatest satisfaction and self pride. At least that is how I approach it. My own "verbal spankings" sting far worse than anything Dr. Sea could hand out and Dr. D yours kind of tickle. Maybe that is why it has not worked so far. :) In the end, it is those moments on a Manitoban Walkabout that we face our conscience and it is the only real report card in my book.

Posted 2 years ago #
John Mastrobattisto
Member

I am very impressed with the emotional intelligence on this thread. I have been following this from the begiinning and wondering when the microphone was going to come down from the ceiling and an announcer yelling "Let's get ready to RUMBLE!" This topic is a complete testiment to the level of trust and relationship that has been built at DCM. I can tell you that it has never been stronger or more useful, thanks to you all.

I have come to realize that most of my resistance comes not in the deciding phase but in the action. I find it fairly easy to decide and convince myself what the right thing to do is, but get hung up in the action part. Talk about fear! Hiring and firing staff (I have had someone almost go postal), purchasing software, 7-Accounts, attending seminars, changing techniques/hours/office layout, recording myself, posting on the forum, doing online DCM90 even though you think you know everything after 13 years, planning rejuvinations, etc. In other words, trusting the process. I have experience with all of the above and have made the decisions and taken action with each example and have always come out for the BETTER. Most situations I have made the right decision and taken the correct action "over time", but at what cost was the delay in action? LOSS OF MOMENTUM. What is it that I am affraid to find out, is the real question? This is where the EQ process as helped me most. Becoming aware and then regulating once you are aware. You are all inspiring. Great work and thank you.

Posted 2 years ago #
Jason Whittaker
Member

"Fear of Failure is imagining the future as a repeat of the past. Fear of Success is remembering the past could never be as good or better in the future."

Pick your poison.......if growth lies at the edge of comfort and discomfort, at some point we all stand over that edge and look down into the abyss wondering if we'll land like a feather or a rock. Either way taking the step is the key. Staying there.....looking down.....gets you NOWHERE. But every second that goes by is still an opportunity to be NOW HERE and make the choice.....to RADIATE your body and mind to be as light as a feather or GRAVITATE your body and mind to be as heavy as a rock......then just take the step.

"Thelma?"
"Yes, Louise."
"Hold my hand."
"Ok."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4z88U915uq8

DISCLAIMER: All postings written by said author are self "prescriptions" for said author to take as a medication for himself and not of the opinion for anyone else posting to take so called "prescriptions".

Posted 2 years ago #
dorian swystun
Member

Dr. John I really like your point about what it costs delaying action in making change......LOSS OF MO! It's like pushing a huge boulder one push at a time, but letting the boulder STOP before giving it that next push. Each push has to be as hard as the last one. Exhausting! Dr. Chris, I can really appreciate your comment that people like to put their head in the sand and pretend everything is ok. It is easy to create the illusion that "everything is ok", the same way we can allow ourselves to fall victim to the illusion of fear. Both become paralyzing in their own ways. One thing for me that has become relevant since SF is that if we are crystal clear about our vision and destiny, decisions and actions about change are easier to make and manage. "Does this change move me closer to my vision and destiny?" Yes or No? If yes, nothing can stop you. The vigour with which you pursue that change and take action will be in direct proportion to how closely you have connected your vision and destiny to your highest values. In essence, you won't want to take your hands off the rock. You will always want to keep it rolling.

Posted 2 years ago #